enecoo:

Omg, so I was at the convenience store minding my own business when some random dude showed up and talked about Kylo Ren with the cashier, I overheard the conversation and I was like, omg, they like Reylo too and I tried to sneak my way in, both of them saw me and asked me if I liked Reylo.

I felt like I had no choice but to give in and asked them if there was a problem, they replied, “We were talking about Star Wars ships, omg, are you a big Reylo shipper too?” Suddenly, as they dropped their guards, my muscles started to bulge, tearing apart my shirt, I unleashed a flurry of over one hundred punches which targetted both of the fans’ pressure points.

I shouted “HOKUTO HYAKURETSU KEN!” (Hundred crack fists of the North Star) to give the audience an idea of what technique I had used.

The Reylo shippers chuckled and told me that it didn’t hurt, but little did they know that it was the legendary martial arts style of Hokuto Shinken that has been passed down for over 2000 years and that I was its rightful successor. I turned my back on them and contently replied, “Omae wa mou Shinderu.” 

In total ju wa-shock and disbelief, they replied “NANI?” as their heads started to swell up and explode. People were impressed by my martial arts style and shook my hand as I went back home to enjoy my mac and cheese.

True story